My space of peace – LOH # 156 Contest

On this occasion I have chosen the second question, of the two that are asked in the contest: What makes you hold onto hope? Enlighten us on something you do to create a safe, positive space around yourself, to boost the belief or conviction to always look for the cloud with a silver lining, even if it means starting again?

This is a deep question, which requires a good answer; but in order to give it, it is necessary that I explain to you what it means to currently live in Venezuela, and although I am not going to go into much detail, as I would have to make an extremely long and depressing post, I will give you some context.

Venezuela is a tropical country, in which, fortunately for those of us who still live here, it does not have very different climatic seasons, that is, the climate is always good, so, in a large part of the country, except in the Andean zone, we do not require firewood or heating to withstand the cold. This is good, because it allows us to survive and also facilitates the planting of vegetables and the existence of fruits, which can complement the diet of some inhabitants. However, there are many shortcomings; for example, even if you live in a town or a city, there is no possibility of enjoying constant public services: There is no running water, the electrical service is extremely unstable, the internet connection is even worse, the home garbage collection service is almost non-existent, public lighting is fatal, the public transportation system is terrible, the highways, roads, streets, avenues are destroyed, there is no gasoline, there is no cash, there is excessive corruption, anarchy, indolence, institutional anomie and lack of values in the population; and as icing on the cake, forced migration, which has been another factor in the destructuring of society.

Additionally, the Public Health system is TERRIFY. I will tell you an anecdote as an example. Almost three years ago, a cat entered my house. As he was a young and inexperienced cat, he didn't know how to get out of here. I had to guard my three dogs so they wouldn't attack him and also guard my five cats, to prevent them from fighting. This little animal, very scared, was in the gap between a wall and the ceiling; so I rolled down a ladder and tried to get him down to feed him. I was able to do it, but when I tried to get close again, he got very scared and gave me a big bite on my left hand, and then ran away into the street. I know well the risks involved in a bite from an animal that you do not know if it is sick or not, or vaccinated or not against the rabies virus.

As it was almost night, I knew that I would not get any Public Health center open, so I washed and disinfected the wound, and prepared to leave early in the morning, to receive the first dose of the rabies vaccine. I didn't go to a private health center, because that vaccine here, where I live, is only administered in Public Health centers...well, that's what I thought.

To cut a long story short, the next day I went out and visited 6 Public Health centers (large and small) in my town, and in all of them they told me that they did not have that vaccine, that they only had the Cuban vaccine (not tested). , against COVID. I was not looking for that vaccine and I never took it, because I did not agree with it, but that is another story. The last health center I visited was the Hospital, which, when it was inaugurated in 1970, was a model hospital in my country, but that, unfortunately, remained in the past. I approached the Epidemiology Department, where they told me I could receive the vaccine, but they were tearing it down, supposedly to rebuild it. They sent me to the Emergency Room, and well, that was disastrous, because just upon entering I noticed a foul smell, of putrid water. When I looked up, I saw black water dripping from the ceiling, this made me sick and afraid at the same time. I continued forward, and found a very dirty area, with broken stretchers, tables and chairs, with almost no lighting, where they received people with injuries or very sick people. The floor was full of blood and other human excretions, which you can imagine what they were. This was bizarre. A nurse saw me and asked me why I was there, and I explained my situation. She told me to follow her, and took me to a cubicle where there was a small chipped and dirty refrigerator, which she opened to check whether or not there was the rabies vaccine. Obviously, I didn't wait for a response, I practically ran away from there, because I think I would have gotten even sicker if I took that vaccine; however, I managed to hear when I was leaving that they did not have it available. I didn't even say goodbye or thank her.

To finish this story, I will tell you that I was in suspense for six months, praying to God that I had not been infected with the rabies virus, since this virus can take up to 6 months to manifest itself and is deadly. That day I returned home and called my animals' veterinarian crying, asking if he could give me a dose of the rabies vaccine that he gives to my dogs and cats, but he told me that was not possible. He calmed me down and told me that in the municipality there were no recent reports of animals infected by that virus, and although this calmed me down a little, it did not take away my anxiety for a long time.

This is a small example of how something simple like a cat bite can turn into something deadly here in Venezuela. Imagine what it means to have a serious illness, suffer a traffic accident, require an operation. It is something extraordinarily exhausting and terrible, a TRAGEDY.

This is a sample of the day to day, the daily life of 90% of Venezuelans who are still here; and I haven't talked about what it means to make magic to feed a family, cover expenses, etc. and other things that should be a human right. It's like living The Hunger Games in an extreme version. It is a continuous uncertainty and effort, to survive. I have always thought that we are subjects and experimentation grounds for some evil power, to see how much a population can resist, survive and how it can break it. And I clarify, I do not write what I write as an exercise of complaints to arouse pity, commiseration and compassion, quite the opposite, since I rarely talk in my posts about the situation of the country, but I believe it is necessary to do so, to speak with the truth , because currently there is a narrative driven by people who still live here, who say that everything is fixed and perfect in Venezuela, and they even use the Public Health System as an example, and believe me in 2023 it is much worse than three or two years ago .

Well, I already gave you some context, so that you can see that living in Venezuela means putting our physical and mental health at risk, because it is a continuous stress that does not stop, and that sneaks into every crevice of daily life; but, back to the topic of this week's contest, which explores what makes me cling to hope and how to create a safe and positive space around yourself. I honestly cling to hope because I firmly believe in God, in His immense love and compassion, and I believe that at some point He will create the conditions for everything to improve. This on the one hand. On the other hand, and as the wonderful African proverb that accompanies this question says, which says "Do not lose hope, no situation is permanent", I am firmly convinced of this, the point is that time is relative, and not I know if this situation will last years, decades or centuries...

But in my country there is also a saying that says: "He who gets upset loses", and I know that there are negative situations in my environment that I cannot change, so, I have chosen, especially in recent months, to avoid getting upset or despairing as much as possible. . Of course, I can't do it 100% because I'm a human being, but I know well that I can't get the white water distribution system rebuilt, because even if there are resources to do so, those in charge, will steal that money. Nor can I ensure that there is more gasoline, that food is reasonably priced, or that one day Public Health centers are clean and functional. So I have chosen to optimize my resources to the maximum, and look for alternative solutions to the problems, since I have no other option.

And in order to feel better, I connect with nature. I have said it before: If I am not close to a natural space, I literally dry up and consume myself, so my safe and harmonious space is my solar, my backyard, where I observe that magical little forest, that place in where many plants and animals of all kinds coexist in harmony. I look at the trees, the flowers, the raindrops, a plant being born. I smell the aroma of blond bee, which is something delicious; I smell the cherry trees, the guavas, the citrus blossoms, I hear and watch the birds, the lizards, the turtles, the opossums, the sheep, the skunks... all this gives me PEACE, and helps me maintain hope and also my sanity.