I I FAILED TO SHOW UP

I'm not in the habit of making promises. I've somehow grown into that lifestyle. Making promises comes with some pressure of its own and certainly, I am allergic to that adrenaline rush. I dislike the frenzy and letting people down.

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Making promises should be a big deal and for that I do not take people up on the ones that they make to me. It could've been made in the spur of the moment, due to excitement, anger or whatever. Besides, time and circumstances could switch things up in a minute, making a person incapable of living up to his promises.

The word 'i will' sounds to me like a subtle promise and I'd rather use that than say "I promise." I cannot think of the last time I made any promises. I either say a thing and stick to it or not say anything at all.

The word is so common that it is thrown around everyday and has come to hold no strong ground. I like to stand by my word.

The one time tho I recall making a promis was a time back. At the time, I attended this music institute where I was leaning to play the piano. In course of my time there,I met this fellow student, we got talking and found we were from neighbouring communities in the same state.

Sometime around the end of the year, the institute scheduled to hold one of her annual concerts. It was to Mark the end of the year and also showcase her students. I had not been attending the rehearsals so would not be amongst the players.

So apparently this friend had told his mum about meeting a townsperson. He asked if I would be attending the event. I was uncertain but said yes since the mum would like to meet me too. I guess he sensed my uncertainty and asked if I was sure and I affirmed. And then he made me promise to not be absent.

On the event day, you can be sure that I was absent that day. My anxiety always got the better of me plus outdoor stuff is not my thing. I'd rather just stay back home.

The very day after the event, myself and the fellow student got talking and he mentioned how his mum had attended the event and asked to see me but I was nowhere around. He expressed his embarrassment since wanting to meet with me was one of the reasons the woman had graced the event. I had no explanations for what happened. All I did was tender my apology which was heartfelt. Although, frankly, i still would not have gone if the event was held the next day even. I had no excuses but I was only sad to have dashed his and his mother's expectations. That wrong of me. It could have taken nothing from me to say that i would not be available.

Gladly, not much changed between us. We were barely close. Just acquaintances. And that's fine.

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