DON'T MAKE A FUSS ABOUT EVERYTHING!

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(Edited)

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In engaging with the post of @jhymi I found this Kiss contest from minimalist community. This is my first time participating in minimalist community, I hope to have fun doing so.😃

This post explores some situations and events that tend to be hyped or exaggerated, but I find contentment and joy by approaching them with a minimalist perspective. The first two are celebrated with excesses. While acknowledging their importance, read to see how I take up a minimalist view to avoid unnecessary extravagance.

The World is filled with so much fuss about one thing or the other. Life is supposed to be lived simply. Here are some of the things people make a fuss about that I as a person do not worry about at all.

BRIDAL SHOWER

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I witnessed an incident in which a bride fell victim to a robbery while en route to the hotel. Little did she know, the makeup artist she had chosen had recently received a substantial payment from a client. This unfortunate circumstance caught the attention of thieves who managed to trace them to the hotel.

Upon arrival, all the ladies present had their phones taken, and the bride experienced the same fate. Additionally, her ATM card was taken, along with the makeup artist's money and phone. I was at the bride's house cooking when they all came back from the hotel crying.

This distressing situation could potentially have been prevented had there been no bridal shower. From my perspective, the bridal shower presents a certain level of risk, as not all the friends in attendance may have genuine intentions.

When I had my wedding fifteen years ago, we didn't know anything about bridal shower. But a night to my wedding, my female friends came to my room and we all danced and practiced their part for the next day. Some offered me their gifts that night and there wasn't any other thing added -- no hotel rentage, special revealing gown for all, cake and bed decorations nor food . We just danced and laughed. We all went to bed on time so they could wake up early to help with preparations. But these days, the young ones stay in the hotel room while old women assist the caterer.

ELABORATE WEDDING RECEPTIONS

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Every parent dreams of witnessing their child's wedding day. However, some wedding celebrations leave me asking whether certain couples might end up in financial strain after the event. I strongly believe in the importance of marriage, as it is a lifelong commitment rather than a one-day ceremony.

Weddings often display a diverse array of guests dressed in various attires. At times, you might encounter six to eight different groups wearing uniforms (Asoebi). Beyond that, some guests indulge in feasting, consuming too much amount of food and drinks, even to the extent of taking some home . Rather than guests offering gifts to the newlyweds to aid their start in married life, gifts are handed out to guests among the couple's families.

My husband recently attended a wedding and returned home with a bottle of wine valued at N13,000 and a clipper. He mentioned that Ankara fabric, a small drinking flask, 1Kg of Semovita, and numerous other items were distributed. While I share in the couple's happiness and would have collected all that if I was at the party, 😅 but I find the extravagance somewhat excessive.

Imagine what would be going on in the minds of the single ladies in that ceremony! They too would want theirs to be better than that. As such they put so much pressure on their spouse, parents and even those attending. Yes. They make you buy expensive attire to put on, else you are seen as a gate-crasher.

I'm acquainted with a caterer who unexpectedly received an invitation to cook in the UK. A guest who attended a ceremony here in Nigeria and enjoyed her food provided her contact details and expressed intentions for the caterer to cook at her daughter's wedding overseas. Initially taken as a joke, it turned out to be real as the caterer obtained a visiting visa. She will be preparing dishes for a wedding abroad, with all expenses covered by the bride's parents. 😃 This seems quite lavish, in my opinion. No good cook in the whole UK? The funds expended on such a movement could instead benefit the less fortunate or be channeled into supporting charitable endeavors.

VACATION

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During school holidays, children enjoy visiting different places. Some parents even take time off work during these periods to spend quality time with their kids. This trend continues during festive seasons, as people travel long distances to celebrate in their hometowns. Is the celebration in the village more enjoyable? I also travel occasionally, not necessarily for any specific event, but to keep my mother company as my siblings bring their children home to socialize. However, I don't believe this is an obligatory tradition. With the current high fuel prices, I reconsidered a summer trip with my kids due to the associated costs. I decided to teach them how to code simple games instead, which they find enjoyable. They also connect with their grandma through video calls while learning.

HIGH COST OF LIVING

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In Nigeria, times are tough, and many families are struggling. Some are in debt and facing pressure from banks to repay loans. Depression is affecting some due to life's anxieties.

While things are hard everywhere, living simply and worrying less can help. Stick to your budget, eat nutritious food , it doesn't have to be very expensive. Cut down on unnecessary expenses. Go for only what you need. Traders need money and so push their wares to you on credit. Reduce impulse buying. Focus on survival and what you can control. Eventually, things will get better.

This is my entry into minimalist contest and I am glad to participate.

Thanks for stopping by . You are highly appreciated.

Yours,
@adoore-eu.

First image source edited with photo editor.

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SPANISH

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Al participar con el post de @jhymi encontré este concurso de Kiss de la comunidad minimalista. Es la primera vez que participo en la comunidad minimalista, espero divertirme haciéndolo.😃

Este post explora algunas situaciones y eventos que tienden a ser exagerados o exagerados, pero encuentro satisfacción y alegría al abordarlos con una perspectiva minimalista. Las dos primeras se celebran con excesos. Sin dejar de reconocer su importancia, lee para ver cómo adopto una perspectiva minimalista para evitar extravagancias innecesarias.

El mundo está lleno de tanto alboroto por una cosa u otra. Se supone que la vida hay que vivirla con sencillez. Éstas son algunas de las cosas por las que la gente hace tanto alboroto y que a mí, como persona, no me preocupan en absoluto.

ROBO DE NOVIAS*

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Fui testigo de un incidente en el que una novia fue víctima de un robo mientras se dirigía al hotel. Ella no sabía que el maquillador que había elegido había recibido recientemente un importante pago de un cliente. Esta desafortunada circunstancia llamó la atención de los ladrones, que consiguieron seguirles hasta el hotel.

Al llegar, se llevaron los teléfonos de todas las mujeres presentes, y la novia corrió la misma suerte. Además, se llevaron su tarjeta de cajero automático, el dinero y el teléfono del maquillador. Yo estaba en casa de la novia cocinando cuando todas volvieron llorando del hotel.

Esta angustiosa situación podría haberse evitado si no hubiera habido despedida de soltera. Desde mi punto de vista, la despedida de soltera presenta un cierto nivel de riesgo, ya que no todas las amigas asistentes pueden tener intenciones genuinas.

Cuando celebré mi boda hace quince años, no sabíamos nada de despedidas de soltera. Pero una noche antes de mi boda, mis amigas vinieron a mi habitación y todas bailamos y ensayamos nuestro papel para el día siguiente. Algunas me ofrecieron sus regalos esa noche y no hubo que añadir nada más: ni alquiler de hotel, ni vestido especial revelador para todas, ni adornos para la tarta y la cama, ni comida . Sólo bailamos y reímos. Todos nos fuimos a la cama a tiempo para que pudieran levantarse temprano para ayudar con los preparativos. Pero hoy en día, las jóvenes se quedan en la habitación del hotel mientras las mayores ayudan con el catering.

BANQUETES DE BODA ELABORADOS

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Todo padre sueña con presenciar el día de la boda de su hijo. Sin embargo, algunas celebraciones de boda me hacen preguntarme si ciertas parejas podrían acabar en apuros económicos después del acontecimiento. Creo firmemente en la importancia del matrimonio, ya que es un compromiso para toda la vida y no una ceremonia de un día.

En las bodas suele haber una gran variedad de invitados vestidos con distintos atuendos. A veces, podemos encontrarnos con seis u ocho grupos diferentes vestidos de uniforme (Asoebi). Además, algunos invitados se dan un festín y consumen demasiada comida y bebida, hasta el punto de llevarse parte a casa. En lugar de que los invitados ofrezcan regalos a los recién casados para ayudarles en su comienzo en la vida matrimonial, los regalos se reparten entre los invitados de las familias de la pareja.

Hace poco, mi marido asistió a una boda y volvió a casa con una botella de vino valorada en 13.000 N y un clíper. Mencionó que se repartieron telas de Ankara, un pequeño frasco para beber, 1Kg de Semovita y muchos otros artículos. Aunque comparto la felicidad de la pareja y habría recogido todo eso si hubiera estado en la fiesta, 😅 pero encuentro la extravagancia un tanto excesiva.

¡Imagínate lo que estaría pasando por la cabeza de las solteras en esa ceremonia! Ellas también querrían que la suya fuera mejor que esa. Como tal ponen tanta presión sobre su cónyuge, padres e incluso los asistentes. Sí. Te obligan a comprar un atuendo caro para ponértelo, porque si no te consideran un rompepuertas.

Conozco a una empresa de catering que inesperadamente recibió una invitación para cocinar en el Reino Unido. Una invitada que asistió a una ceremonia aquí en Nigeria y disfrutó de su comida facilitó sus datos de contacto y expresó su intención de que la empresa de catering cocinara en la boda de su hija en el extranjero. En un principio se tomó a broma, pero resultó ser real, ya que la cocinera obtuvo un visado de visita. Preparará platos para una boda en el extranjero, con todos los gastos cubiertos por los padres de la novia. 😃 En mi opinión, esto parece bastante lujoso. ¿No hay un buen cocinero en todo el Reino Unido? Los fondos gastados en semejante movimiento podrían beneficiar en cambio a los menos afortunados o canalizarse para apoyar obras de caridad.

**VACACIONES

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Durante las vacaciones escolares, los niños disfrutan visitando distintos lugares. Algunos padres incluso se ausentan del trabajo durante estos periodos para pasar tiempo de calidad con sus hijos. Esta tendencia continúa durante las épocas festivas, ya que la gente recorre largas distancias para celebrar en sus pueblos de origen. ¿Es más agradable la celebración en el pueblo? Yo también viajo de vez en cuando, no necesariamente para algún acontecimiento concreto, sino para hacer compañía a mi madre mientras mis hermanos traen a sus hijos a casa para socializar. Sin embargo, no creo que sea una tradición obligatoria.

Con los altos precios actuales del combustible, me replanteé un viaje de verano con mis hijos debido a los costes asociados. En su lugar, decidí enseñarles a programar juegos sencillos, que les resultan muy divertidos. También conectan con su abuela por videollamada mientras aprenden.

**ALTO COSTE DE LA VIDA

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En Nigeria corren tiempos difíciles y muchas familias pasan apuros. Algunas están endeudadas y se enfrentan a la presión de los bancos para devolver los préstamos. La depresión afecta a algunos debido a las angustias de la vida.

Aunque las cosas son difíciles en todas partes, vivir con sencillez y preocuparse menos puede ayudar. Cíñase a su presupuesto, coma alimentos nutritivos, no tienen por qué ser muy caros. Reduzca los gastos innecesarios. Compre sólo lo que necesite. Los comerciantes necesitan dinero y te ofrecen sus productos a crédito. Reduce las compras impulsivas. Concéntrate en sobrevivir y en lo que puedes controlar. Con el tiempo, las cosas mejorarán.

Esta es mi entrada en el concurso minimalista y me alegro de participar.

Gracias por visitarme. Te lo agradezco mucho.

A ti,

@adoore-eu.

Primera imagen Fuente editado con photo editor

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17 comments
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I agree with your points because a lot of these things do not happen before and we started seeing them all of a sudden.

The main issue about these things is how couples get broke after the marriage.

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In itself, they are not completely bad. But when it is done with the intention of a showy display of one's means of life or over-burdening others to comply and support, that's when I don't like it majorly. In all, living simply is the best

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Indeed some of the things you've mentioned are highly extravagant but on the aspect of bridal shower, I think it was a bad day for that bride but I don't really see anything wrong with having such but for baby shower I do. Bridal shower can be done in a minimal way but nowadays everyone wants to do better than the previous person which is unhealthy.

No wonder they say, problem nor dey finish, lol 😂

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Hahaha, problem nor dey finish really. Bridal shower is not bad , it's a free world, any who can afford it can go ahead. But care should be taken too, that's an avenue the devil can use for jealous friends., Besides for the groom too, that can be an avenue to get him drunk, since all guys are alone too somewhere. Before you know it, someone will be hearing story about a lady he slept with on the wedding night now becoming a nursing mother somewhere after nine months time. 😃😃. We just need to be careful these days, the World is wicked. Thanks for coming around.

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That's right 👌, it's the mode in which we do these things that is the problem really.

God go help us

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I agree with you all the situations there can be adapted to your budget limits. For example vacations, I love to spend in a hotel of course. But we can also go camping and spend half of what we spend on hotels, using tents! Children love that

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Thanks for coming around and for your input. That camping makes sense and for sure, it's not as expensive as hotels. Just like taking children to the beach. They will never forget the memories, meanwhile it is not costly too. Thanks again.

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You hit on that comment, thinking about the effect that attending pompous weddings has on other women. Sometimes this has even been known to cause a kind of competition between them, and perhaps this is related to the stress of the bride that day. When I have assisted as a wedding photographer, I have noticed that those who have a simple wedding are the ones who enjoy the most and seem happy on the occasion. Greetings @adoore-eu

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Very correct. I remember when I was having my own wedding. Hubby told me that we will travel back that same day on a 4hrs journey just to attend a welcome party for us in his family house. The thought of abandoning the real party and travelling for 4hrs really gave me concern and it could have ruined my day. But when I dialogued with him to allow the wedding run on one another and let his family fix the welcome party another day, he obliged and that was how I enjoyed my wedding. People complicate their lives too much with unnecessary things. I don't want to contribute to my death, haha. I love to live my life simply.

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It's very funny why people think some celebration really matters because I really do not see the need for most of them. There was a time when all these things didn't exist and the world was doing really good but things have taken a new turn and everything is so messed up.

People go broke after spending unnecessarily on events and end up lamenting when they should blame themselves. Some of them don't even learn their lessons because they end up throwing another big party at every slight celebration.

I came through dreemport

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(Edited)

The struggle continued here in Nigeria. Normally it is the best to take pur kids for outings sometimes. This would make them feel so happy.
#dreemport

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Everyone wants to do better than the other and that's just the main problem. It's not about showing off, you have to make plans for the future as well. If after spending millions in a day and you are left with nothing to cloth or even feed, what do you intend to do???

I also love taking my kids on vacations during holidays but with the present economy, it's off the list 🤣.

#Dreemerforlife.

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